Quicker than one-liners dirty.

From Dirty Harry, we’ve learned what happens when you feel lucky — or at least, when Clint Eastwood’s Harry Callahan challenges you to ponder your fortune. When Scarlett O’Hara asserts that tomorrow is another day in Gone with the Wind, it’s more than optimism; it’s a testament to the enduring human spirit. Not merely filler …iPhone One Liners We live in a world where losing your iPhone is more dramatic than losing your virginity. You traded in your iPhone 4s for an extra half inch? Hope your girlfriend doesn't do the same. My boyfriend is like an iPhone 5s. I don't have an iPhone 5s. Dear Internet advertisements, no I don't want to shoot the birds to win an iPad or ...Jul 24, 2022 · Dirty Riddles I. Riddle: I am mostly six inches long. I go in and out of your mouth in a rhythmic pattern. I am more comfortable when wet and very unpleasant when dry. I can be more fun when I vibrate. In the …Jul 11, 2023 · Today I am sharing what I think are 35 brilliant one-liners. They all made me smile and I hope at least one or two of them will make you smile too. I must confess that though I’ve collected these from various sources I haven’t been able to identify the original authors. So they’re all classified as Author Unknown.Puns And One Liners. Check our Twitter and Facebook feeds for a joke on the hour every hour… Menu Close Indexes; 2023; 2022; 2021; 2020; 2019; 2018; 2017; 2016; 2015; 2014; 2013; Dream Jokes I dreamt I wrote The Hobbit the other night. I think I was Tolkein in my sleep.

Three Words: Chuck Norris Golf. 23. Golfer: “I think I’ll go drown myself in that lake.”. Caddie: “I don’t think you’ll keep your head down long enough.”. 24. Golf is a lot like taxes…you go for the green and come out in the hole! 25. It takes a serious amount of balls to golf like I do. 26.

Officer, I know I was going faster than 55MPH, but I wasn't going to be on the road an hour. I stayed up all night playing poker with tarot cards. I got a full house and four people died. I used to work in a fire hydrant factory. You couldn't park anywhere near the place. I went to the hardware store and bought some used paint.

Jul 23, 2019 · Think of it as Seinfeld versus Chapelle: Both are funny, but only one comedian can play in the background while your 10-year-old is still awake. With that in mind, here are 76 super corny one-liners for kids that get to the punchline as quickly as possible. If one doesn’t land, just move on to the next one because that’s the beauty of the ...27. You can’t believe everything you hear—but you can repeat it. 28. There’s a lot to be said in his favor, but it’s not nearly as interesting. 29. They’ve been treating me like one of ...Jul 26, 2020 · Jake Lambert. "Maybe this is the beer talking, but I'm an alcoholic drink made from yeast-fermented malt flavoured with hops." Andy Field. "Life Hack: When too tired to do all the things on your ... Everything was fine until she was told that she would actually have to wear one! What goes up and down quicker than a lift, Britney Spears Knickers. submissons by: write.to.obaid, susan8aharris. Joke Generators: Click Here for a random Pick Up Line; Click Here for a random Yo Mama Joke; Click Here for a random Dirty Joke; …

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It’s older than the Sydney Opera House, my penis!”. – Rhod Gilbert. “I accidentally filled the Escort with diesel. She died.”. – Gary Delaney. “I’ve never laughed a woman in to bed ...Faster Than One Liners . Huge list of some great ones liners for you to enjoy. List of one liners to use from life, shows and movies . I love coming up with cheesy quotes from …Mar 6, 2024 · One-Liner's One Line Insults. Your problem is you have million dollar dreams with a minimum wage work ethic. We call her "Happy Meal", because she always cums with a toy inside. I hope life bites you in the ass. You have enough padding there to take the hit. A dickhead like you would have to take Viagra as a nasal spray.Mar 22, 2010 · Top 100 funniest one-liners. 1 I asked God for a bike, but I know God doesn’t work that way. So I stole a bike and asked for forgiveness. 2 Do not argue with an idiot. He will drag you down to his level and beat you with experience. 3 I want to die peacefully in my sleep, like my grandfather.. Not screaming and yelling like the passengers in ... Save. Laughter is good for you. The following is our hand picked collection of 50 of the funniest one line quotes that is sure to leave you in splits. These quotes are not only funny, they are also pretty clever. So enjoy! Now if only I could teach him to play fetch! “If history repeats itself, I am so getting a dinosaur!” ― anonymous.1. I asked the IT guy, “How do you make a Motherboard?” He said, “I tell her about my job.” 2. The inventor of the throat lozenge died last month. There was no coffin …Welcome to “100 Adult Jokes: Laugh Out Loud with Puns & One-Liners,” the ultimate collection that’s guaranteed to bring a smile to your face and a chuckle to your day! In this space, we serve up a smorgasbord of jests, from the witty to the wacky, that’s perfect for your adult sense of humor. Get ready to dive into a …

Jimmy Carr has the best one-liners. Seven minutes of escalating offensive jokes (one-lines, a lot of them) from Mr. Carr. I really like this 10+ minute of his where he puts hecklers in their place. I think Andriy Shevchenko was the only person from the region that got a …Put your icing away. I’ve got something you can frost with. I can see into the future, and yeah, we’re gonna fuck at least once. Rumor has it you like bouncing. I’ve got something you can bounce on. I’d love to explore the box your virginity came in. I know, you be the coffee and I’ll give you some creamer for free.Are you planning to build a beautiful pond in your garden? One of the essential components you will need is a high-quality pond liner. The right pond liner will not only ensure tha...Introduction. Ever wondered how comedians can get a room erupting in laughter with just a single line? That's the power of a well-crafted one-liner. Let's dive …Best Short Faster Than Jokes. Short faster than jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The faster than humour may include short quicker than jokes also. When you live alone, the only thing that wakes you up faster than a cold toilet seat Is a warm toilet seat ; Did you hear that the US …r/oneliners. About. u/Major_Independence82. • 9 hr. ago I tell every woman I sleep with that I’m giving her 12 inches… on an installment plan. 11 7. Share. u/AnimatorNr1. • 3 hr. ago I talk to myself, because sometimes I just need expert advice. 3 1.Despite being a low budget film, Dirty Dancing quickly took the world by storm when it strutted into theaters in 1987. The fun coming-of-age film propelled the careers of Patrick S...

Basically, due to being so short, these jokes are very universal and can be used in a variety of circumstances (appropriate ones, of course) and ways. #4. The problem isn’t that obesity runs in your family. It’s …Self-employed. #10. If a threesome is with three people and a twosome with two, do you now understand why people call you ‘handsome’. #11. An elderly couple was attending a church service. The lady turned towards her husband and said ‘‘I just let out a really long silent fart.

Oct 13, 2023 · From the delightfully dirty to the worst (or should we say "wurst") one-liners, these jokes are perfect for adults looking to add a touch of humor to their Halloween celebrations. Close Menu. ... these Halloween jokes on dad include dirty, worst, stupid one liner jokes. Pick suitable Halloween jokes that fit your mood or situation. [adinserter ...Jul 12, 2023 · Please God, help me out…”. Then, when the man looks down, he sees it. A free space, just ahead on his left. It shines in a golden beam of light coming down from the clouds. The man looks up once more and says, “Actually God, it’s alright, I just found a space.”. If you wish to visit Outer Space, you’re an Astronaut.Embark on a journey to master the craft of the killer one-liner with our insightful guide. Uncover the secrets behind brevity, the unexpected twist, and relatability, used by professional comedians to create waves of laughter. Hone your comedic timing, delivery, and learn how to write jokes that will keep your audience … Dirty Short Jokes. There was a young maid from Madras. Who had a magnificent ass; Not rounded and pink, As you probably think –. It was gray, had long ears, and ate grass. There once was a man from Bel Air. Who was doing his wife on the stair. A one-liner is a succinct, often witty remark that encapsulates humor, wisdom, or an observation in a single sentence. It's the verbal equivalent of a quick sketch, delivering impact with brevity. Think of it as the punchline without the setup, a flash of insight or comedy in just a few words. I put my money back in my pocket, just in case he's right. One liner tags: life, money, sarcastic, time. 94.57 % / 1843 votes. Ham and Eggs: A day's work for a chicken, a lifetime commitment for a pig. One liner tags: animal. 94.56 % / 1777 votes. Anger; the feeling that makes your mouth work faster than your mind. A stock market crash is worse than a divorce, you lose half your money and your wife is still around. One liner tags: marriage, money, women. 86.90 % / 135 votes. My wife and I were happy for twenty years. Then we met. One liner tags: marriage. 82.57 % / 1666 votes. I asked my wife to embrace her mistakes. She gave me a hug.

Jul 11, 2023 · A fish swam into a concrete wall, Dam! Change is inevitable, except from a vending machine. When life gives you melons, you might be dyslexic. The guy who got hit in the head with a can of soda was lucky it was a soft drink. The man who invented knock-knock jokes should get a no bell prize.

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The nearest thing I can do to a poll: I’m making a Chimney one-liners video for season 4, and have realised that I missed a few in my video for seasons 1 to 3. Do I: Make a video for seasons 1 to 4 (about 14 minutes long), so I can add in the few lines I missed the first time round. This is one of the most iconic of all the classic cowboy one-liners. It speaks to the idea that quick thinking is generally more effective than slow thinking. “Never let your mouth write a check your backside can’t cash.”. This is another classic cowboy saying that speaks to being careful with your words and actions.cartoons, jokes, one liners, one-liners, One Liners, One-Liners, One-liners, dirty jokes, clean jokes, comedy, humor, humour, funny stories, confucius say, Confucius Say, put downs, come backs, observations . More One Liners. Confucius Say Insults and Putdowns One-Liners, Page Two One-Liners, Page Three Home Page …By Alex Nelson. April 24, 2023 2:27 pm (Updated April 24, 2023 2:28 pm) Sometimes you just want to make somebody laugh, but are pushed for time. Whether it’s the swift one …When it comes to maintaining a pool, one of the essential components is the pool liner. A quality pool liner not only enhances the aesthetics of your pool but also protects it from...If you are planning to create a beautiful pond in your garden, one of the most crucial decisions you’ll need to make is choosing the right pond liner. A pond liner not only helps t...An old one but sic. "faster than an ethiopian running after a chicken!" The Donster Inner circle 4817 Posts: Posted: Jun 13, 2005 05:50 pm 0. How about my money is gone quicker then I can make it thanks to something called a wife. ruaturtle Regular user Gastonia, NC 113 Posts: Posted: Jun 19, 2005 12:15 pm 0. … I put my money back in my pocket, just in case he's right. One liner tags: life, money, sarcastic, time. 94.57 % / 1843 votes. Ham and Eggs: A day's work for a chicken, a lifetime commitment for a pig. One liner tags: animal. 94.56 % / 1777 votes. Anger; the feeling that makes your mouth work faster than your mind.

Well water can get dirty when there is a lack of maintenance in the well system, which can lead to deterioration. Wells may have to be cleaned, and because some people never do thi...Feb 23, 2023 · Short Easter puns. Easter Sunday: Hare today, gone tomorrow. You put a hop in my step. Hey there, hop stuff! I think you're ear-resistable. Dyeing eggs: Easter said than done. 9 – Faster than a knife fight in a phone booth. This faster than expression is most commonly heard as like a knife fight in a phone booth which means very unpredictable and chaotic. When used as faster than a knife fight in a phone booth it of course means very quickly. Combat with sharp blades in such close quarters is bound to end in no ... "lost faster than a one-legged man in an ass-kicking contest" "out like a boner in sweatpants" "kicks like a bag of ninjas" Archived post. New comments cannot be posted and votes cannot be cast. Instagram:https://instagram. weather underground boston massachusettspart from me lyricswedding cross stitch free patternmatchmaker tequila 20 Funny Feline One-Liners That Any Cat Owner Will Relate To. Today the cat is out of the bag with one-liner jokes about our feline companions and their relatives. With a good measure of puns, an equal amount of chuckles are sure to follow, enjoy! A man goes into a library and asks for a book about Pavlov’s dogs and Schrodinger’s cat.Here is a list of several of the best “Quicker than a..” or “Faster than a..” one-liners that I made up or found online. I was trying to come up with something funny for a … unit 3 relations and functions homework 4 answer key pdfbrooklyn neighborhood for short crossword clue Whether you’re looking for a quick joke to share with friends or need a witty comeback to lighten the mood, these funny one-liners are sure to do the trick. From … brownish orange crossword clue 10 letters 50 Hilarious Dirty One Liner Jokes List. Posted July 5, 2017 by wititudes. Next → . Posted in: Jokes, Lists Did you enjoy this? → . Next →. Search for: Recent Posts. Breaking News … I’m just a girl … I plan my whole day around the possibility of a nap … I need one of those long hugs where … 11 More Politically …To fill the void collectively left by The Raid: Redemption, John Carter, and Wrath Of The Titans, we’ve assembled a collection of The 25 Best One-Liners In Action …